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Children don’t come with an instruction manual, and the reason for this is that not all children are the same. If anyone tries to sell you a notion that there’s one way to parent, there isn’t. Good parenting involves being able to react and respond in a flexible way to the issue that your child is displaying. In light of this complexity, the ‘Asking for a parent’ podcast will describe the most common and complex child rearing challenges and provide better ways for listeners to understand a child's behaviour. One of the best predictors of child behaviour is a parent’s understanding of the meaning behind the behaviour. Therefore the discussions inform parents of why children do what they do, and how best to respond to it. Lots of parenting resources out there heap pressure on parents rather than promote reasonable expectations and understanding. This podcast is conversational, and will not be filled with jargon or unreasonable expectations. The solutions are be ‘real world’ and take into account of parental pressures of time and energy. Topics under discussion will include the severe challenges to the normative developmental issues. Ranging from a teenager who is developing eating disorder behaviours to a 5 year old who is nervous about going to birthday parties. All challenges are relative and the podcast will aim to be as comprehensive as possible. Listeners can send in their own questions or worries about their child or indeed about their own mental health concerns and these will be addressed where possible. About the author / presenter Dr Colman Noctor is a Child and Adolescent Psychotherapist and has working with families with mental health difficulties for 25 years and has a wealth of international experience. Colman does not describe himself as a ‘parenting expert’ as he believes the concept doesn’t exist. Colman’s advice and suggestions are based on his knowledge of the emotional, psychological and behaviour of children and the learnings he has achieved from working with families for the last 25 years. Graphics by Matchstick Media Ltd https://www.facebook.com/mstickmedia/
Episodes
Wednesday Dec 09, 2020
Wednesday Dec 09, 2020
In this weeks episode I am joined by Newstalk’s Susan Keogh as we discuss her parenting journey. We discuss the parenting dynamics when you have one child. We discuss the concept of supporting children to be independent and resilient. We discuss the challenges of childhood friendships and the issues of potential exclusion from groups.
We also discussed the ways in which we can support young children to prepare for the world of technology and social media. Exploring how to prioritise the important internal variables and not sweat the small stuff.
Keywords: Parenting an only child. Supporting resilience in childhood friendships. Preparing a child for the world of technology and social media
email : askingforaparent@gmail.com
twitter : @Asking4aParent
instagram : asking_for_a_parent
Sunday Dec 06, 2020
Sunday Dec 06, 2020
In this weeks episode I am joined by Parenting support founder Aoife Lee to help answer all your questions. In this episode we talk about the preparation for a Covid Christmas.
We also discuss many topics including how to manage toddler tantrums and misbehaviour. We talk about Childhood anxiety and supporting children through friendships when betrayal and disrespect is evident. Alongside a discussion about keeping a child with learning needs engaged in school.
We talk about ways to challenge Negative Automatic Thinking, the importance of self esteem when it comes to relationships and the emotional challenges of dyslexia.
In this episode Aoife and I discuss the challenges of parenting during times of stress and how to manage our expectations when we feel overwhelmed.
Keywords: Managing Toddler Tantrums. Supporting anxious children. Helping children with Dyslexia and other learning needs. Supporting resilience in friendships and Negative Automatic thinking.
email : askingforaparent@gmail.com
twitter : @Asking4aParent
instagram : asking_for_a_parent
Wednesday Dec 02, 2020
Wednesday Dec 02, 2020
In this weeks episode I am joined by Columnist Sarah Carey. In this episode we discuss many topics including how ones own parenting experience impacts on our eventual parenting style. We discuss ways of maintaining our mental health during Covid 19.
We discuss how order of birth can impact on children’s personalities. The challenging transition to secondary school. Negotiating the complex landscape of children’s sport.
Supporting anxious children who ruminate over little things. Raising teenagers and managing children of different ages.
Keywords: Raising teenagers. Transitioning to secondary school. The contention of school lockers. Supporting anxious children
email : askingforaparent@gmail.com
twitter : @Asking4aParent
instagram : asking_for_a_parent
Sunday Nov 29, 2020
Sunday Nov 29, 2020
In this weeks episode I am joined by PSI President Mark Smyth. In this episode we discuss many topics including parenting in a pandemic. The mental health impact of Covid 19. Utilising discipline with small children. Supporting a child with Selective Mutism. Supporting teens to have better relationships with technology. The stress of homework and workload.
Understanding behaviour from the perspective of the child. Trying to support children after an incident of extended family fallout. The parenting challenge of raising boys who engage in overly boisterous play and mastering the feelings of being cooked up at home during lockdown.
Keywords: Homework overload. Gaming and technology. Discipline and small children. Emotional Regulation. Selective Mutism. Boisterous play and parenting in lockdown
email : askingforaparent@gmail.com
twitter : @Asking4aParent
instagram : asking_for_a_parent
Wednesday Nov 25, 2020
Wednesday Nov 25, 2020
In this weeks episode I am joined by Ireland AM’s lovely Laura Woods. In this episode we discuss many topics including Laura’s experience of growing up as an only child. She also discusses the parenting challenge of raising boys and mastering the balance between being fair and equal but also acknowledging their individuality when they earn reward or sanction. We also discuss the challenges of managing children of different ages when it comes to video games and different activities.
We also discuss the balancing act of scheduling extra curricular activities for children and knowing how much is too much when it comes to involving children in sports and groups.
Keywords: Only Child, Parenting Boys, Dealing with equality and difference in parenting. Deciding on how many extra curricular activities are enough for young children. Don't forget, if you have any parenting questions and would like to get in touch you can do so via
email : askingforaparent@gmail.com
twitter : @Asking4aParent
instagram : asking_for_a_parent
Sunday Nov 22, 2020
Sunday Nov 22, 2020
In this weeks listeners questions episode I am joined by my sister Catherine Sharkey where we discuss many topics that have been sent into the Asking for a Parent Podcast. We discuss the challenges of parenting teens who have become vampires over lockdown, sleeping all day and awake all night. We answer an interesting question about managing the role of step-parent.
We explore what to do to manage an overly attached 4 yr old who’s struggling in lockdown. We explain how tummy pains can be used as a means of trying to get out of going to school.
We discuss the issue of child to parent hostility and the complexities of parenting adult children. And we discuss a number of questions about how staff can manage while working in an early childhood environment.
We conclude the show by demonstrating ways in which we can maintain some balance in our lives so as to do the best we can to maintain our mental well-being in these messed up times.
Don't forget, if you have any parenting questions and would like to get in touch you can do so via
email : askingforaparent@gmail.com
twitter : @Asking4aParent
instagram : asking_for_a_parent
Wednesday Nov 18, 2020
Wednesday Nov 18, 2020
In this episode we take a different direction and talk to a father about his experience of parenting in the pandemic. This weeks guest is RTE Radio One’s host of Rising Time, Shay Byrne.
In this episode we discuss the challenges for parents of children who have missed out on core aspects of their experiences as a result of the Covid 19 pandemic. Where Shay discusses how his children missed out on Transition Year, Irish College and a Confirmation. We discussed the ways in which we as parents discuss disappointment when things don’t go to plan and how this year we have had to become adept at that skill.
Shay also talks about his own childhood and tells some humorous stories about his experience of growing up and how he followed his ambition and heart into a career in media. We also discuss the pressure on parents to put expectations on children and how this can sometimes jar with out own value system.
Shay also discusses his role as a funeral celebrant and we discuss the complexities of loss and grief. We also discuss the thorny issue of how best to introduce teenagers to have healthy relationships with alcohol and ways in which we as parents can manage societal expectations in these challenging times.
Don't forget, if you have any parenting questions and would like to get in touch you can do so via
email : askingforaparent@gmail.com
twitter : @Asking4aParent
instagram : asking_for_a_parent
Sunday Nov 15, 2020
Sunday Nov 15, 2020
The volume of questions we have received about parenting challenges that involve children with ASD (Autistic Spectrum Disorder) has been considerable. In light of this, we have decided to stockpile the themes of these questions and dedicate this episode to this topic. Given the complexity of ASD, I decided to ask an expert guest to join me to discuss the issues. Miriam Kenny is the parent of a child with Autism, and she set up the “Involve Autism” organisation which campaigns for educational provision for children with ASD.
In this episode we discuss the challenges for parents of children with ASD and answer the questions that have been sent to the Podcast. We discuss ways to support children with ASD. Managing parental differences in managing ASD. We also discuss the deficits in services and how best to engage in meaningful inclusion, integration and understanding.
Miriam offers and unique understanding of how the world is experienced as a parent of a child with ASD and she describes support services and strategies to help both the parent and child navigate the social landscape. Even if you are not directly connected to a child with ASD, chances are that you know a child in your own child’s class or a neighbour’s child or a relative with ASD. This episode aims to highlight the ways in which we as parents, schools and communities can help to make meaningful change in terms of inclusion and integration of children with social communication challenges.
Don't forget, if you have any parenting questions and would like to get in touch you can do so via
email : askingforaparent@gmail.com
twitter : @Asking4aParent
instagram : asking_for_a_parent
Wednesday Nov 11, 2020
Wednesday Nov 11, 2020
In this episode Mairead and I talk about coping as a parent through the pandemic and Lockdown 2. We go on to discuss how our experience of being parented has an impact on how we become parents ourselves. Mairead discusses the challenge of raising children with long age gaps between them, and wonders about the different parenting approaches to boys and girls, sons and daughters.
We discuss the challenge of deciding when and how we introduce our early teen to technology and social media. We discuss the strengths and risks of introducing technology too early or too late and explore how we can encourage a child to have their voice and nurture their self-worth.
Keywords: Surviving Lockdown 2, Parenting Boys and Girls, Blended families, introducing children to Social media and nurturing self worth
Don't forget, if you have any parenting questions and would like to get in touch you can do so via
email : askingforaparent@gmail.com
twitter : @Asking4aParent
instagram : asking_for_a_parent
Sunday Nov 08, 2020
Sunday Nov 08, 2020
In this episode Petrina Tighe and I answer the questions submitted by listeners. We talk about coping as a parent of teenagers through the pandemic and the importance of cutting them some slack. We answer questions about managing sibling rivalry and supporting healthy sibling relationships when sharing and compromise is difficult.
We also have an interesting discussion about responding to parental separation where the one parent is attempting to alienate the other.
Following on from our episode with Alison Curtis, who spoke really candidly about losing both of her parents in her teens. We answer questions about supporting children through grief and loss.
We then discuss knowing when to refer a child to receive professional help. Colman speaks honestly around the deficits within the national systems of support and helps parents to access the correct service to support their child.
We talk about supporting non-sporty children who struggle to make friends and discuss the importance of helping them to find their tribe. This is followed by a discussion about how to promote self-worth in children if the parent themselves has poor self worth in themselves.
Colman finishes the episode by talking openly about his own parenting challenges.
Keywords: Supporting teens in Lockdown, sibling rivalry, Grief and Loss, parental separation, when to seek professional help, and supporting parents who have poor self worth.
Don't forget, if you have any parenting questions and would like to get in touch you can do so via
email : askingforaparent@gmail.com
twitter : @Asking4aParent
instagram : asking_for_a_parent